My first au pair experience in the United States began in September 2018, when I left Curitiba, Brazil, for Virginia, U.S. With its clean streets and refreshing breezes, Curitiba was my childhood home, but I had always wanted to travel more. The early autumn air was pleasant and humming with cicadas when I arrived in Virginia. Although I spoke English well, I quickly discovered that fluency does not always equate to understanding as I adapted to life with my host family.
I was warmly welcomed by my host family, and I enjoyed spending time with their two energetic children. However, I was often surprised by American expressions. Before realizing it was an idiom, I looked around for a boat when someone said, “We’re in the same boat.” These moments made me laugh at myself and gave my host family a chance to share the quirky proverbs they grew up with.
In Virginia, I was introduced to the richness of American traditions. We baked pies for Thanksgiving and picked pumpkins for Halloween. In return, I introduced them to pão de queijo, a Brazilian cheesy bread they quickly grew addicted to, and taught them about Brazilian Independence Day, celebrated on Sept. 7. While this cultural exchange was enriching, I often missed my family’s laughter during Sunday lunches and the comforting sound of Portuguese on the streets.
After spending a few years in Virginia, I moved to a small New Jersey town to live with a new host family. Initially, the transition was daunting, but the family—parents and their two daughters welcomed me warmly. They included me in everything, from family game nights to weekend outings. I learned to play Monopoly and grew closer to them through our shared victories and defeats.
The daughters were bright and curious, with a keen interest in my culture. They helped me improve my English while I helped them practice Portuguese. This mutual exchange deepened our connection. Within a few months, I no longer felt like an au pair but rather like a member of their family.
If you’re considering becoming an au pair, here’s what I’ve learned:
Expect to learn and teach: Even with good English skills, cultural nuances take time to grasp. Sharing your traditions helps build bridges with your host family.
Embrace change: Each family and location offers new experiences. Moving to a new place can be challenging but incredibly rewarding.
Find joy in small moments: Whether it’s carving a pumpkin or teaching a new word in Portuguese, these moments create lifelong memories.
Build relationships: The more you open up to your host family, the more they’ll include you in their lives.
Now, as I sit at the dinner table with my host family in New Jersey, surrounded by love and laughter, I feel immense gratitude for this journey. Living in America has taught me not only about a new culture but also about connection, resilience, and the beauty of blending two cultures into one.
